Well, well, well...

I have achieved to neglect this blog… yet AGAIN! Unfortunately, I've been spending way more time either posting in my Photography/Design blog or on my tumblr.

I did however, create a new blog logo and symbol! Huzzah for finding time to do something graphical!

I will either figure out a way to link my tumblr or make more of an effort to post more in here… until next time however…

Cheers!

Valentine's & Love?

Well apparently I only post on holidays... I will try to change that routine *crosses fingers*. Valentine's Day is not a favorite among most if not all of my friends... whether it just be the fact that everyone seems to be single around this time, or some previous love that broke their heart ruined any chance for them to enjoy a little love on this love-ly day.

River and I have never really done anything special or spectacular for Valentine's Day, other than enjoy the fact that today is a day dedicated to love.

So just a quick message to everyone who may not be a fan of Valentine's Day, take heart in the fact that you have love in other places, not just in a significant other. You father no doubt? A mom? Your grandma HAS to have some for you, right? How about a nephew? Your pets surely do! And if all else falls short of love, know that I have love in my heart for you (and so does Tiny)!!

Please???

Ho Ho Ho & Merry Christmas!

Well... I am now officially someones wife (and I'm still weirded out by the change in last name, even though it's pretty cool) as of October 30th, 2010! What a great day, honestly! It was perfect!!! Now I'm just trying to be patient and wait for my pictures, even though its been OVER a month... *le'sigh*

Thank you to all who joined us to celebrate, both physically and in thought! We couldn't have had such a wonderful time without all of you! YES YOU!!! :D

Our first Thanksgiving as a family, and we hosted dinner for both River's parents and my own. Tiny was perfect and napped right as we were about to eat, sweet! I was pretty proud of myself for not ruining any of the food, but my timing however was horrible. Luckily everyone was patient and I made artichoke dip as a pre-dinner dish and that kept everyone's hunger at bay.

Now its Christmas season, we have our tiny little shrub outside lit up and all festive (even though now it is covered in snow and you can barely see any of the lights) and the christmas tree is up, lit and ready for ornaments. We are a little hesitant about ornaments however, as Tiny is making it known that he is capable of "sliding" across the floor to what he wants, as I found him under the couch after looking away for 10 seconds. So ornaments may have to wait until a few christmas-es from now, but we shall see.

I will try and get a picture posted of our nicely decorated and festive house., though I want to decorate more, but just don't know what should go where and what to have that would be easy (and baby proof). Ah well.

Just as I thought graduation was in the bag, now there is another hiccup, but hopefully a few words with the right people (maybe a few tears too) will help get that back in order.

Hmmm... what else what else to share... Tiny is now 7 months old, and I cannot believe how fast time has gone! Through everything, good, bad, worse, and ugly, I cannot wait to have another baby to give Tiny a well deserved sibling... though River and I both agree that that will have to wait for about 5 years or so... (we shall see).

Until next time my fellow humans!

The Parental Units & New Place

Well, we've officially moved into our new apartment (technically a duplex) and I ABSOLUTELY love it! Laundry in the basement that is ALL ours, backyard for Tiny to play (well for now, sit on a picnic blanket while Mommy reads), garage, office, and an actual place to put a dinning room table! There is definitely many more perks to our new digs, but those points are probably my favorite thus far. We still have most things in boxes, but all the essentials are unpacked and in use; also made sure to have Tiny's room all done and unpacked completely!

We can't really afford day care, and so my grand plans forgetting as many hours at work and NOT being a stay at home mom have changed. I am a stay at home mom, but I love it, honestly I do! And I'm planning to soon get serious about my entrepreneur - ness so hopefully that will make me feel better about contributing (plus I NEED something to do too)!

Thinking about getting my Master in Information Technology through online classes, but not quite sure what to do about that just yet.

Today, both sets of parental units came to visit our humble abode and see Tiny of course. Went out for lunch and actually had a great time; talked about wedding stuff, showed off bridesmaid's dresses and shoes, my necklace, and also found a veil in the middle of an intersection on the way back from lunch (could it be a sign that we're moving in the right direction!?).

Not much else to report on. I will get pictures up of the new place once we have everything, or most everything, put away and organized.

Busy Busy Busy & Did I Mention... ?

Well I am getting very busy with just about everything these days; an almost 3 month old son (still not sleeping through the night), wedding planning which is now in full effect and certain people are starting to stress me out with their unnecessary comments and worries, trying to get back to work (even though I'm pretty sure either A. My messages are being ignored about coming back to work B. The answering machine is broken or C. I'm fired :/ ), I have to figure out daycare/babysitter and how I'm going to pay for said services, AND I have to get my school work finalized and completed... SOMEHOW! *gasping for air*

Other than that, life is grand :P

I actually some how managed to convince my parents to watch the little minion Tuesday and Wednesday (well, and I hired a friend to watch him during the day while they're at work). While they are doing that wonderful favor, I'm back in the EC trying to get a few things checked off of my "to-do-list"; so we shall see if I can actually get a check marked...

Since I got back a little later than I had hoped today, I wasn't really able to get a head start on completing stuff, so River took me on a date to the drive-in and we saw a double feature ('The Sorcerer's Apprentice' & 'Knight and Day').

Well I am going to try to get to bed here since its almost..... 3:30am. I should be getting up in like 2 hours to go to Water Hydro but... I don't think I'm going to be motivated enough to do that, me thinks. Who knows though, I've been working through today on about 4 hours of total sleep (not continuous I might add).

'Night!

PS: I am going to see Hanson on the 10th of August which I'm super excited to just see some live music, not necessarily excited because it's Hanson. My friend Keels really loves them so I am taking her with me as a Birthday present for her :D

Being a Parental-Unit & Just Let the Small Things Go :P

Well, its been 2 months since Tiny was born and my life has changed exponentially!

I'm not going to sugar coat parent-hood by any means and don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change anything about my life thus far, but being a mom is hard. Having a newborn definitely had its ups and downs (mostly downs for me as I do not do well on 2 hours of sleep at a time). I definitely believe that if I had had some kind of local support group or even another mom my age around that I wouldn't have lost my mind as much as I had in the first couple of weeks. Someone who could tell me that most everything that happened happens to all mothers and 'its COMPLETELY NORMAL to feel that way'! My mom told me that a million times, but I feel that if had come from someone going through the same thing (aka a younger mother) that it may have stuck a little more.

I have been following another blog recently that has put a smile on my face every time I read it. Mostly her blog is about small space living and nifty ways to utilize what living space you have, but she does have a few blurbs here and there about parenting and her experiences. (PLUS she's also a user of the gDiapers, so thats a bonus!)

My favorite post of hers is a list of things to expect to feel as a new parent within the first three months and I want to share it here as well:

"New-Parent Milestones: A Guide to the First Three Months

Congratulations! You’re a newparent. As with any newparent, you’re probably wondering how your development should progress. Here’s a general guide to week-and-month milestones through your first three months. Note: all newparents develop at their own rate, so you may not reach these milestones within the approximate timespan. If more than one or two days were spent in the hospital, these developmental milestones may be delayed by that number of days/weeks. If you’re concerned about delayed newparent development, please call a friend with a newborn baby and compare notes.

The First Week
By the end of the first week, you should:

Know your baby’s name;
Recognize you are no longer pregnant*;
Be certain that leaving the baby unattended will result in its instant suffocation;
Fall into an extended fit of crying over something seemingly trivial, such as losing a blanket*;
Have eaten breakfast at least twice;
Thank your lucky stars for Vicodin*;
Realize you have too many of one baby item and not enough of another;
Get annoyed with someone who laughs at your lack of sleep;
Wonder what you got yourself into.

The Second Week
By the end of the second week, you should:

Understand how to button and unbutton a sleeper effectively;
Have a babycare pattern set up with your newparent partner;
Have eaten lunch at least twice;
Bathed the baby;
Cried over something not-so-trivial, such as Nonspecific Infant Fussiness (NSIF);
Purchased baby items online that were not bought for the shower*;
Reconsidered 15% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Reorganized the changing table so it’s sensible for 3 AM diaper changing;
Been peed and/or pooed on at least once;
Realized your family now has three people, not two, and that you may never have another uninterrupted meal with your newparent partner;
Send a birth announcement by email and Facebook;
Heard “Welcome to parenthood” at least once;
Wonder what you got yourself into.

The Third Week
By the end of the third week, you should:

Have argued with a grandparent over the proper grooming/feeding/holding/changing of the newborn;
Reconsidered 30% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Welcomed at least one visitor to your home who stands no nearer than five feet to the baby;
Thrust the baby into the arms of said visitor for a photograph;
Uploaded photos to a website;
Thought of your baby as its name, instead of as “the baby” or another nonspecific nickname (Tadpole, Peanut, Little One);
Leave the house without the baby at least once;
Be able to nap at will.

The Fourth Week
By the end of the fourth week, you should:

Begin to recognize your baby’s various cries;
Suspect that leaving the newborn unattended in a safe place will not result in instant suffocation, and possibly even leave the baby unattended for up to ten minutes at a time, broken up by one check for breathing (this includes sleeping);
Reconsidered 45% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Begin surfing online for miracle baby solutions, and buy at least one;
Realize that not only do you not own a baby sunhat, but that it’s autumn and they are nowhere to be found;
Be able to feed the baby whilst half-asleep
Make dinner at least once;
Cleaned up a major diaper blowout at least once;
Wonder when you’ll have time to/feel like having sex again;
Leave the house with the baby at least once.

The Sixth Week
By the end of the sixth week, you should:

Realize rationally that leaving the newborn unattended in a safe place will not result in instant suffocation
Be able to leave the baby unattended for up to forty minutes at a time, and only check for breathing twice (this includes sleeping);
Have reconsidered 60% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Try out miracle baby solutions, and reject at least one;
Have bathing the baby down to a science;
Be able to feed the baby whilst asleep.

Two Months
By the end of the second month, you should:

Realize emotionally that leaving the newborn unattended in a safe place will not result in instant suffocation
Be able to leave the baby unattended for up to 90 minutes at a time, and only check for breathing twice (this includes sleeping);
Have reconsidered 75% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Taken the baby to a childfree home and been embarrassed when the baby cried/threw up/pooped its diaper;
Called the baby by its name;
Paid the first of many hospital bills;
Gotten around to picking up your baby’s birth certificate;
Cried through your newborn’s first vaccination.

Three Months
By the end of the third month, you should:

Realize that not only will leaving the newborn unattended in a safe place not result in instant suffocation, but that the last eight weeks were spent freaking out for no good reason, except that doctors and nurses enjoy hazing new parents;
Not only be able to leave the baby unattended for up to 180 minutes at a time, with no breath checks, but hope for those 180 minutes all day, every day;
Performed at least one panicked breath-check when the baby slept from 4 AM to 8:30 AM, and you didn’t wake up once;
Have reconsidered 95% of the advice received whilst in the hospital/from baby books/from relatives;
Taken the baby on an overnight trip and realized the sheer amount of luggage and small creature requires;
Begun realizing how many clothes you’re really going to go through in the first year, as you’ve already filled up two bagsful of clothes the newborn has outgrown;
Begun swaying back and forth, whether or not you’re holding the baby;
Paid the fourth, eighth, and tenth of many hospital bills;
Know exactly how to make your baby smile and laugh, thus guaranteeing that you are willing to hold, burp, feed, change, and clean her up on an hourly basis.

*Female and/or formerly pregnant newparents only."

Little Tiny & his Miracle

Tiny was born at 3:24pm on May 3rd, 2010. He weighed 5 lbs 15 oz and was 19 inches long. He looks just like his Daddy but has his Mommy's impatience :P

I had started having contractions early Monday morning around 7:00am or so, and so I started timing them. Turned out to be a good thing that I did that because they were about 3-5 minutes apart for a solid hour and a half straight. I called my doctor and she said to go in if they continued for another hour (which they did). River came home from work after I called him and told him what was going on, and after that we finished packing my go-bag/hospital bag and headed on out. We did make a pit stop at Target first in order to get a few snacks and I of course forgot my toothpaste.

We arrived at the hospital around 11am and were put into a smaller room where I would be evaluated to determine whether or not I was going to be admitted. They hooked me up to the fetal monitors, determined that I was 3.5 cm dilated and then we just sat around waiting for awhile. I had called my mom earlier in the morning after timing my contractions and so she had headed on up to Eau Claire and arrived around noon (I had also called Keels, who said she would come to the hospital later if I did actually get admitted). After mom got to Eau Claire and came up to the room we were in, the nurse suggested walking around for an hour or so to see if my cervix would dilate any more. So mom of course took charge and had me walking the hallway like a crazy person but it was kind of fun to chat and just relax (as much as I could in between contractions anyway). After about 2 hours, around 2:30pm, I was almost fully effaced and only 4 cm dilated but they wanted to admit me (hurray)! I called Keels to let her know what room we were going to be moving to, which was the rather large water birth room with the HUGE tub and nice TV :D

My nurse came in (Teriena I believe was her name) and she said that my Dr. wasn't here yet but had said she wanted the Resident Doctor to break my water in order to get my cervix dilating more and get the labor process fully underway. Of course she said it was up to me if I wanted to do that, and I said I was okay with breaking my water (especially if it was going to make things move a little faster). The Resident Doctor (a man) came in with the nurse a few minutes later to break my water. The first attempt he didn't seem to really get anywhere and it was beginning to be uncomfortable so he let me have a little break. The second attempt, he finally managed to break my water, but said that it might take a little bit for the fluid to actually come out. I moved around a little bit while laying in my bed and felt the gush of water I was told to expect (by this time it was close to 3:10pm), which was a relief to me knowing that my labor was actually going to happen! River peeked at the fluid to make sure it was clear like they had said it should be, but found that it was pinkish/red with blood so he told me to press the call button.

The nurse for the shift change came in a few seconds later and noticed on the fetal monitor that the baby's heart rate had dropped dramatically. She had me lay down flat on the bed and turn to one side and then the other in order to try and move the baby around (and possibly off the umbilical cord). She couldn't get his heart rate to increase any so she had to call for another nurse to come in, who then called over the hospital intercom a "Code-C". River nor I had no idea what was going on but I of course was frantically trying to figure it all out in my head while laying there being man-handled and prodded by suddenly 10 different people all at the same time. I remember having a lot of questions and comments flying through my head in a panic but all I could vocalize was "is the baby okay" which no one responded to.

Suddenly, they were carting me out into the hallway and River's hand was pried from mine and I felt myself panicking and gasping for air. This sudden reality seemed like a nightmare and I had no idea what was happening, though I did manage to ask "where are we going" and FINALLY got a response saying: "we're going to the operating room to get this baby out." At that moment, I heard my mother say something (I think it was "Honey, I'm right here" and then heard her say "She gets panicky and someone should just talk to her") and I was having trouble breathing and I was feeling really cold. A bunch of people were talking and asking me questions but I couldn't answer anyone because I couldn't breathe properly. I felt them prepping my abdominal area with the sterile stuff (the orange stuff you see on TV or in movies) and suddenly it hit me that I was going to have a c-section. Finally someone (not sure who) leaned over so I could see them and looked me in the eyes and said "we're going to put you under so we can get your baby out safely, are you allergic to any medication?" (I managed to shake my head no) and then he said "okay, I just want you to breathe deeply and we're going to take really good care of the both of you." Last thing I remember, my throat felt like it was being crushed and I was trying to say "I can't breathe" but nothing would come out because I couldn't take a breath.

Next thing I remember is opening my eyes in a hallway with an oxygen mask on and who do I see in front of me?! .... River holding my son looking at me with panic and love and every kind of emotion all at once. I remember asking if I could give Tiny a kiss before they continued to wheel me away. After that I remember being in the recovery area for awhile (very tired) and then waking up again in my room where I was handed my son for the very first time. I'm pretty sure I had wanted to cry, but I couldn't muster the strength, so I just held Tiny close and thanked God that everything had turned out alright.

A few days later, my doctor told me that the way the umbilical cord was attached to the placenta and it's membranes was very weak, and that when my water was broken, one of the smaller blood vessels ruptured causing me and Tiny to start losing blood (and causing Tiny's heart rate to suddenly drop). She said that if this had happened at any other time or at any other place, Tiny would not have been saved no matter how fast they may have reacted. (They had him out in 9 minutes, by the way... CRAZY).

I thank my guardian angel for being so close to us both that day and am very grateful for the tiny miracle that is my son.